THE FOUR R'S

1. REFLECT

Take a deep breath and think for a moment.  Is a Guideline or agreement truly being violated?  Avoid reacting impulsively.

2. REMIND

Bring the other person's attention to the fact that you have a question as to whether or not they are following the Guidelines, or are violating a related agreement.  Use "humble questions" when possible.

3.  RESTRICT

If the person does not truly appear committed to the groups social code (the Guidelines),  it is time to accept the fact that he or she is choosing to not follow the group's social code.   In doing so, this person is making it clear he or she is choosing to leave the group which is a decision we must honor.

When Restricted, a person's independence is honored, and they lose the any rights and privileges provided by the group which they have chosen to leave.


4.  REINTEGRATE


Should a person decide he or she would like to rejoin the group, a "Reintegration Meeting" is held and -- if the individual can demonstrate sufficient re-commitment to the social code (the Guidelines), the group welcomes the individual back with open arms.  

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